123 DAYS

123 days without a drink
What else are you doing ?
You may stop to think

It's not what I'm doing
It's what I'm not
Don't concern yourself
Don't give it a thought

I have "Life Reviews" everyday
I think about who left
What I've done
How many I drove away

Some of you no longer care
If I live or die
What matter' most to me
Is how hard it is, to try


I wrote this 4 days ago. In some of my writing you will find some of my behaviour abhorrent and/or inappropriate . I still think some of the pieces are good, or at least, I like them. I am not the same person I was when I wrote some of the earlier pieces. Without getting into it, I'm just trying to do the right thing. I still have chronic bouts of depression and insomnia. I choose not to take meds. This may not be the correct choice for everyone, but I feel it is the best one for me. I want to FEEL. Without the pain, I can not grow, and I can not write.

Puna, HI. Aug. 2008