NEW YEAR'S EVE

I'm home alone this evening, and looking at all the festivities on the net. I just wanted to say that I am in a much better space. I also wanted to thank all of you for all of your support in this, my first attempt at blogging. Thank you for all of the comments, and for taking the time to visit me and read my posts. I have made new friends, something I thought I was too old to do.

I'd like to wish everyone a wonderful and prosperous New Year.

THE STORM

The lightning started to come down at about 10 a.m. yesterday. Steve and I started to count the seconds in between the flashes and the thunder. When it got to the 5 second mark, which means the storm is within 1 mile , I disconnected the phone line from the jack of my old Dell which was given to me a few months ago. Within 1 min, while I was watching the end of the phone line , lightning hit the phone line outside and came into the house. The end of the line on the floor lit up into a bluish white ball about the size of a bowling ball , and exploded. The computer went blank. My heart sank.The EMF from the explosion knocked out the Dell. It no longer powered up. The generator was still putting out and the TV and DVD player had shut off, then restarted.
I went a neighbor's and I couldn't even think. I cannot afford a new 'puter , let alone much else.The 'puter is my connection to the outside, I rarely go anywhere. Awhile back, John the chef bought a Compaq Presario 1200 at the farmer's market for 3.oo and gave it to me. It had no hard drive, so I gave it to Steve's brother, Chuck. He installed a hard drive and win 2000. Chuck bought a new 'puter and left the Compaq at Steve's. We went and got it. It didn't show that it had a modem. I installed Win XP , and it had the driver for the modem, which Win 2000 didn't have. Now I have a 'puter whose clock has to be reset everytime I turn it on, but at least it works. All of this was being done in the middle of the storm. Win XP kept telling me how many minutes until the installation was complete, while Steve watched flashes and counted. One would have thought I would have just powered everything down, but I chose the reckless path.I needed the 'puter that bad.
Owen, another neighbor is here and telling Steve and I that the bolt that hit me hit him at the same time, and his telephone interface box exploded along with his phone line. The lightning vaporized the copper wire , turned it into gas , the gas expanded and exploded. Another neighbor about 200 yards away left a phone message saying ball lighting had come into his house and exploded at the same time Owen and I got hit. The island of Oahu lost power last night, but Obama had a generator.
This morning is calm and the rain has subsided.

THE EVE

The fire is my guest today.Crackling, speaking a language only I can understand. 2 saimin fill my bowl, along with 2 eggs and a small piece of cheese. An apple waits 'til later. Absent are the youthful dreams of love , stability, and peace. Only the embers remain of what once was a fiery youth. No calls from parents, they have died. The tear ducts have dried long ago, nothing streaks down my cheeks. An occasional heaving of my chest, that's all that I have left.
Outside the wind blows cold, hard rain. The feeding of the fire keeps reminding me that soon, like it, the spirit of my life will be dying coals then ash. The phone is silent. I look down the driveway hearing the sound of a car, hoping it's a friend. Not to be. Not today. While others gather joyfully, celebrating, and giving, smiling and laughing, I converse with the fire, it's embers crackling. I seek not your pity , for I have shelter, food, and wood to cut.
Soon the sun will set.

COKE AND A SNICKERS

I have been in a dark place for a while. I'd like to say I'm out...but I'm not. I wanted to wish all of you who have read this blog a happy holiday season. I continue to read other blogs but most days I feel like I can't comment. I am eating a snickers bar and drinking a coke, so I've mustered enough energy to post this.

"Now we dolly back,
then we fade to black"

The words in quotes are by Steely Dan, from the song "Haitian Divorce"

I don't know when I will post again, but I'd also like to wish everyone a Healthy, Happy, and Prosperous New Year.

Sincerely,
Emilio